The hardest part of losing my sister was scraping her decal off of the rear window of my minivan.
— Alex Watt (@AlexanderWatt) January 10, 2013
Bruce Wayne's World! Bruce Wayne's World! Sorrow Time! Angstiness!
— Pube Goldberg (@AndyBridgman) January 10, 2013
Seeing Snoopy pretend to be a WWI flying ace is cute but in all seriousness there were extremely high casualties among dog pilots back then.
— Owen Parsons (@owenBparsons) January 10, 2013
Hansel And Gretel just massacre the witch 5 minutes into the film and the rest is them eating CGI'd strudel to “We Are Young” by Fun
— Dan Hopper (@DanHopp) January 7, 2013
The Wii U looks like something you find buried under tangled Nintendo controllers in your parents' garage. twitter.com/joshruben/stat…
— josh ruben (@joshruben) January 9, 2013
Somewhere in the vast desert of DeviantArt, a teen is absolutely CONVINCED that Hollywood stole their idea for a gritty Hansel & Gretel film
— H. Caldwell Tanner (@caldy) January 6, 2013
“Once again, 'not having beautifully symmetrical poops' isn't something I can treat.” -Wes Anderson's doctor
— Wiseguy Pictures (@WiseguyPictures) January 5, 2013
I'd gladly sacrifice, I dunno, everything in my life to not have to get out from under these warm blankets for the next 3 months.
— Kevin Corrigan (@kevincorrigan) January 7, 2013
Frank Sinatra sings like he thinks singing is for queers.
— Adam Conover(@adamconover) January 5, 2013
“It's pretty great if you get high first.” Review of every movie, videogame, and album ever released.
— Jeff Rubin (@JeffRubinShow) January 8, 2013
My mom says “nobody talks anymore, everyone just stares at their phone.” That's because my phone is better than my friends, mom.
— Streeter Seidell (@streetseidell) January 7, 2013
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